Well Being

Vegan Food: Does Swallowing Semen Count?

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photo: Thinkstock

As far as you’re concerned, you’re a proud, strong, ethical vegan. You eat seitan while your friends gorge on steak, drink Silk soy milk while they order milkshakes, and look bitchin’ in your faux-leather boots. But are you vegan in the bedroom? We’re not talking about animal heads mounted on the wall (and we assume your whips are synthetic). We’re talking about something a little more intimate. And a little stickier: Semen.

So, can vegans swallow? Semen is an animal product, because men are animals (get it? men are animals!), and, as we know, being vegan strictly prohibits consuming or using anything that is an animal product. Plus, what if your partner isn’t a vegan? If you are what you eat, would you indirectly be consuming meat or dairy? The Times UK also points out that semen contains sperm, which are alive. So, not only are you consuming something that came from a living thing, but you’re also technically consuming an actual living thing – a lot of them, in fact.

The Times UK did some research and called the Vegan Society to get their verdict. Their response was, “We work to promote lifestyles based on the non-consumption of animal products, and don’t really deal with the consumption of human animal products.” In a Livejournal thread discussing this very issue, vegans argue that it’s okay because the act is consensual – the man gives his sperm willingly (that’s an understatement), while animal products are taken by force.

What do you think? Should vegans be their own judges of whether or not they swallow semen?

(Apologies – your boss may have spotted the word “semen” on your computer screen several times. If he gives you a weird look in the elevator, that’s probably why.)