Getting older is a weird feeling. As you approach 30, you start to realize certain things about life. Most terrifying is that the '90s did not happen 10 years ago, but the rest is mostly positive. You learn about yourself, the people around you and what it is that makes you happy.
Turning 30 is such a big milestone because you're far removed from high-school pettiness, you start to make goals for your life and career and -- hopefully -- you have the financial stability to treat yourself every once in a while. Coming to terms with time, space and morality can be terrifying, but also incredibly refreshing. You have a better feeling for what you want, what you're willing to put up with and there's more confidence as you grow into yourself. Here are some of our favorite things about entering into our 30s.
Some people are toxic and not worth the effort it takes to maintain your relationship with them. And that's completely OK. Friendships should be special, supportive and equal. If you are the one giving your all and your friend is just taking it, reevaluate the relationship. Any friend who looks at you like a sidekick or less than is not worth your time.
Embrace the friendships that lift you up and you feel compelled to lift back up. No real friend should lower your self-confidence or take from you without giving back, even if you've been friends since high school and have had great memories together. The mems don't make up for how you've been treated.
This is one of the most important things to remember as you get older. All your experiences and knowledge shape you into someone who is valuable in your career and relationships. Aim to improve yourself a little every day and look back after a year to see what an incredible person you've grown into. When you recognize your value and potential, others will too. Give yourself some credit. Advocate for yourself. Ask for what you want, because you will never get it if you don't ask.
Some days showering is just hard. If you have long hair, it's even harder. There's so much upkeep, styling, and products that go into a good hair day. When you get that perfect hair day, HOLD ONTO IT AS LONG AS POSSIBLE. Have some dry shampoo ready, do some spritzing and minor upkeep and rock that confidence a second day. Here's the secret to feeling fine about not washing your hair every day: nobody will know that you've skipped a day or two. Pro tip: baby powder also works if you're pushing day three and getting a little greasy.
Don't force something that's not right. No person is worth your time if they're rude, offensive or don't treat you like the awesome human you are. Let them down gently and kindly and move on until you find something that clicks. It's easy to keep something going for fear that you may hurt someone's feelings.
The truth is, by the time you've reached 30, you've probably accumulated a long list of dates, including some you regret going on. If something isn't right, pack it up and move on. Fill your life with good dates instead of bad ones.
The older you get, the more exhausting it is to go out. Drinking until 2 a.m.? No thanks, especially now that hangovers aren't what they were at 21. There is grocery shopping to do, work to take care of, laundry to wash and fold, relationships to maintain and a whole host of adulting to do. Going out one night takes a lot out of you and if you're stuck in bed hungover the next day, you feel like a complete waste of space. Why risk this when you can wear sweatpants, lay under your favorite blanket and get lost in a good book or TV show? And then you can go to bed, wake up and tackle your to-do list. Amazing.
I'm sure that Forever 21 find was super dope in 2010, but many years, washes and fashion trends have passed and as nostalgic as it may be, it's time to give it up. Professional clothing is where "less is more" really comes into play. Invest in quality, timeless pieces instead of cheap, trendy ones. You will not only have clothes that last but ones that are fad-proof. A great-fitting blazer can be dressed up or down and incorporated into many styles and fads. Same goes with a well-tailored pencil skirt or straight-leg pants. It'll cost a little bit more, but it's worth the investment.
If you've put effort cultivating your work wardrobe all week, you deserve the opportunity to not give a single shit during your off-hours. I think we're all on the same page that leggings and yoga pants feel amazing. If it feels good and isn't hurting anyone, go for it. (And in no instance do leggings as pants hurt anyone, nor should they be policed as part of a dress code.) We're entering winter and when it's cold, nothing feels better on your body than a giant sweater and stretchy leggings. Live your best life and wear leggings as pants.
Looking back, your parents were right about a lot of stuff. Now that you're reaching 30, you start to see that they had a point. Even better? Hanging out with them is even more fun than you thought. Booze cruising with dad? Awesome. Shopping with mom? Awesome. Use your adult years to cultivate a special relationship with your parents, as long as it as healthy and positive. You may learn that you're not so different from the people or person who raised you.
Nobody is going to put their midday breakdown on an Instagram story or their carefully curated landing page. While a person's life looks fabulous, luxurious and exciting, their social media presence only tells a fraction of the story. Everyone goes through bad days, hardships and self-consciousness. It's just a part of human nature. There's a popular quote that says "Don't compare your bloopers to someone's highlight reel." Remember that when you start looking at someone's perfect, millennial-pink tinged feed. Plus, the bloopers are the most fun to watch.
I believe there is no such thing as a guilty pleasure. If you enjoy something, you shouldn't be ashamed of it. The things you thought were lame as a teenager or twentysomething aren't as embarrassing as you once thought. Listen to Britney Spears three days straight. Watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians when you've had a stressful week. If it makes you happy, indulge. Don't let anyone tell you what you enjoy isn't cool. Also, when you're in your 30s, being cool isn't as big of a deal as you once thought it was.
You can't complain about policies if you don't vote. While presidential elections are the most talked about, it's the local elections where you can make the most impact. Vote, campaign and educate yourself and others to see the change you want in your community. Getting involved not only gives you a sense of accomplishment but the feeling that you are making a positive change where you live. It doesn't take much to get caught up on local elections and voting schedules. Many local publications do the work for you by writing up information on voting locations and ballot proposals. Research has never been so simple.
It's a fact, we've all had some really ugly moments in our lives. Growing and learning is tough and those who grow and learn alongside you are the people worth investing energy and time into. The people who have seen you at your absolute worst and still love you no matter what are the ones to hold onto tightly. Be there for those friends the way they were there for you and be a continual source of support and inspiration for each other.
The companionship of an animal is something special and not to be taken lightly. If you are ready to devote the time, money and resources to a living creature, it might be time to get a pet. Research has shown there are plenty of emotional and physical benefits of having a pet in your life and taking care of one is a deep source of joy. By the time you're 30, you've been on your own for a bit taking care of yourself. It might be time to take care of another creature.
Sometimes it's hard to see your friends with three kids while you just ate ice cream for dinner the third night in a row. That's their life and this is yours. Having kids shouldn't be the benchmark for adulthood. Did you go to work today and do a good job? Congrats! You're an adult! Did you make sure you scheduled your wellness checkup? You did it! Look at all the little things you do every day that take effort. They add up. Having a child isn't some special entryway into adulthood and it's completely okay to not want kids at all. Neither makes you less of an adult.
Millennials are in a unique and special generation where we're driven by passion and our core values meld into our careers. The way we view careers is now changing and if you are unhappy in a job, it's totally alright to change it until you find the right fit. Doing so will even teach you things about your skill set you don't even realize. Don't waste your time in a position that drains your energy and confidence. Find something that focuses on your strengths instead of fixing your weaknesses. Sure, it's scary, but when you find that right fit, everything becomes worthwhile.
The great thing about college is that you could arrange your schedule for premium napping opportunities. Now that you're in the real world, naps are a thing of the past. Your sleep schedule needs to be regulated and if one late weeknight out interferes with that, it's all over. Productivity at work dials down to a zero and drinking coffee all morning will just get you all turnt off caffeine until you crash by 1 p.m. It's too much work. Slap on a charcoal mask, read a trashy magazine and get ready for a solid eight hours of blissful sleep.
Honestly, the most important lesson to learn as you get older is that you're gonna die. Inspiring and morbid all at once, fully understanding this will unlock all your ~dreams.~ Eat the cake, say no, listen to '90s R&B for a month, watch season four of 30 Rock five times, prioritize traveling. Find what you enjoy about this life and do it. Don't let anyone get in the way of what you love and what makes you happy. And if you haven't found that thing yet, keep trying. Experience a whole bunch of things, learn from them and eventually, you will find that one thing that brings you joy.
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