Well Being

Studies Now Say Peeing In Pools Is Dangerous, Common Sense Still Says It’s Gross

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peeing in poolsThis post goes out to all you sickos who have been repeating “pee is sterile” and “chlorine kills it” to excuse your perverse habit of urinating in pools. Especially you sickos who do it when a toilet/ocean is just a few feet away. Because it turns out that peeing in pools is not only gross and rude and insulting to the bladder skills you mastered years ago, but also dangerous.

A big thank you to the esteemed Time Magazine for telling us about a new study published in Environmental Science & Technology. This new research suggests that instead of killing urine's unsavory contents, the chemical reaction of chlorine combined with pee makes for “potentially dangerous byproducts.” In your face, pool-urinaters.

The researchers used a technique called membrane introduction mass spectrometry in their study, so you know it's legit. That membrane introduction mass spectrometry determines the presence of harmful byproducts in pools, by the way.

I'm too elated by this scientific evidence supporting bladder control and cleanliness to interpret the results of the study myself, so I'll repeat what the eloquent people at Time had to say:

“Uric acid from human urine mixes with chlorine to create the cyanogen chloride (CNCI) and trichloramine (NCl3). CNCI is a toxic compound that can harm organs like the lungs, heart, and central nervous system. NClhas been linked with acute lung injury.”

Uric acid! Organ harm! Acute lung injury! Well, fear of toxicity should keep me out of any public pool for the rest of my life – as if I was ever going in public pools in the first place. I always knew my lifelong aversion to water parks was not born of me being a weenie, but of real prudence and a commitment to not being submerged in other people's waste.

If you're the kind of sick maniac who goes around peeing in pools, just read this statement from the author of the study, Purdue University professor and exceptionally fancy name-haver, Ernest R. Blatchley III:

“A common misconception within the swimming community is that urination in pools is an acceptable practice, although signs and placards are posted in many pools to encourage proper hygiene. It is also well known that many swimmers ignore these warnings, particularly noteworthy among these are competitive swimmers.”

Then he dropped the microscope and no one old enough to control their bodily functions ever peed in a pool again.

H/T Time/ Photo: Shutterstock