Going To Mars Sounded Awesome, Until We Realized Space Cheeseburgers Are Gross
(Image via Terry W. Virts)
People have been talking a lot lately about that one-way trip to Mars.
You read that right — one way. As in, never coming back. As in, see ya, America! See ya, family! See ya, friends! PEACE OUT ERRRYBODY.
Actually, leaving forever and never having to deal with societal norms and/or pressure ever again kind of sounds ideal. And Mars — hey, that’s a pretty cool place! If you go, you might not be able to get married or have a family, but damn, your Instagram feed would be KILLIN’ it.
However, the thought of eating a space cheeseburger will quickly curb your appetite for space travel.
Although NASA has been able to get a man on the moon and dethrone Pluto as a planet, sadly, it seems the agency is unable to serve a decent cheeseburger. Astronaut Terry Virts recently tweeted this photo of a ‘space cheeseburger' — which actually looks like a combination of mustard and mystery meat wrapped in a sad tortilla.
It's pretty graphic, but here's the OT (original tweet):
#SpaceCheeseburger. Beef patties, Russian mustard, tomato paste, cheese paste, and tortilla. VERY TASTY! pic.twitter.com/OrJ7Kqr3IW
— Terry W. Virts (@AstroTerry) February 19, 2015
Apologies for making you vomit over your keyboard.
While Terry says the burger is ‘tasty,' I doubt it holds a candle to anything BareBurger or In ‘N Out can produce. But if you're gunna go to Mars (or have the first baby there), you better get used to having food that looks like it was chewed and spit out.
Astronauts can only be served partially or completely dehydrated foods in space.
(AKA, no Chipotle. AKA, I'm not going).
You can reach Erin Kelly on Twitter.