Robin Thicke Raises His Patheticness Level By Naming His New Album After Paula Patton

By  | 

Robin Thicke and Paula Patton attending the Grammy Awards January 2014

Robin Thicke had already done a pretty great job at proving he's the worst before he and his wife Paula Patton separated, but since then he's added patheticness to his repertoire with all the grand gestures he's using to win her back. The latest gesture? Naming his album after her. Wow. Just wow.

According to, Robin's upcoming seventh album (out July 1) will be named Paula. Unless that's a reference to Paula Deen or Paula Abdul or some other important Paula, I think it's safe to say that's a tribute to his estranged wife. This news would be pathetic enough on its own if Robin hadn't already made multiple public attempts to win Paula back. There was the time he dedicated a song to her in concert earlier this year, telling the audience explicitly, “I'm trying to get my girl back.” When that didn't work, he must have assumed it was because he was using an existing song. So he wrote a new one called “Get Her Back.”

Unfortunately for Robin, we live in the real world, not a romantic comedy where the couple has a minor fallout and the guy wins the girl back by making an emotional speech at a public event. This is divorce we're talking about. Since Robin dances around next to half-naked women in music videos for rapey songs, possibly grabs girls' butts at award shows, and is a rumored cheater, there are probably some serious reasons for Paula to want out. That's not to mention the Beetlejuice suit and the mustache and the fact that he wears sunglasses inside, which are all grounds for divorce by themselves.

Here's an idea for you, Robin. If you really want to win Paula back, how about actually talking to her in private about the problems in your marriage and your desire to fix things for the sake of your relationship and your young son? As in treating this like a serious, mature, real-life relationship instead of the plot of a young adult novel.

(Photo: Adriana M. Barraza /