Relationships

Yes, It’s Okay To Delete A Good Friend From Social Media Sometimes

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Is it just us, or was it way easier to be friends before social media existed? Now, there are all of these new layers to friendship, and it matters whether or not you’re following someone on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, or Snapchat. But sometimes, social media can get so overwhelming with all those notifications constantly popping up on your phone, and even your own friends can end up being a great source of your stress without even knowing it. You shouldn’t have to stress out because of what someone else is posting or commenting, and if that’s happening to you, it might be time to click that unfollow button.

Some people say it’s immature to delete someone from social media, especially if you have no intentions of actually ending the real-life friendship. But there are definitely times where it’s called for — and if this person is really your friend and you have a good reason for removing them from your feed, they’ll understand.

Thinking about deleting a friend? Here are a few times when it might be best for you to pull the plug, guilt-free.

Their posts aren’t good for your mental health

Depending on where you are in your own life, following along with other people’s personal journeys isn’t necessarily what’s best for you. If you’re struggling with self-esteem or body image issues, that friend who’s constantly posting weight loss updates might actually be really triggering for you, and seeing someone constantly talk about their food as the pounds come off can actually be really damaging.

“When social media outlines weight loss journeys it serves to validate people’s insecurities,” psychotherapist Heather Monroe told Bustle. “It creates an inner dialogue that’s incredibly harmful and negative.”

This doesn’t extend to weight loss only, either — if you’re seeing a friend post anything that makes you feel negatively about yourself, whether it exacerbates your depression or triggers painful memories or something else, it may be better for you to delete them and then add them back when you’re in a better place mentally. If they call you on it, then a good friend will understand that you needed to do what was best, and accept it. It one extra ‘like’ really worth your BFF’s mental health?

They’re always trying to sell you something

Ah, yes, the dreaded MLM. For some people, it’s independent sales work, but it’s usually at the cost of turning your friends into customers. We’ve all had that experience where a friend has messaged us under the guise of wanting to catch up, only to ask if we’re interested in buying her products. It’s definitely an awkward situation, and it can be really disappointing if you were genuinely hoping that person wanted to know what you’ve been up to these days.

If your pal is constantly trying to sell you something, it’s okay to delete her. It’s okay not to want to be constantly marketed to — especially if it’s become all your friend uses Facebook for. If your friend asks you why you’re suddenly missing from her friend list, just politely explain that you’re not interested in what she’s selling and that while you’d like to continue the friendship, buying things from her is never going to happen.

They’re arguing with you – or your friends – on your posts

In 2018, political arguments are everywhere, and the vitriol between people who don’t support Trump vs. people who do is constantly creating nasty arguments all over social media. If you have a friend who is constantly arguing with you in the comments of everything you post, don’t feel bad about cutting off that person’s access to your opinions. You don’t have to debate everyone, and sometimes, argumentative people commenting on your stuff can turn really bad really fast — like if you check your notifications only to find that your best friend from high school is calling your dad rude names.

According to what political experts have told Forbes, the best way to stay friends with someone who disagrees with you on subjects like that is to simply stop talking politics with them. In this case, deleting your friend might be the only way to save the friendship, if you still are wishing to continue it despite differing opinions on serious issues.

They’re close with someone who’s hurt you in the past

It can be really hard when one of your friends is still friends with another person who’s hurt you, like an ex or a friend you’re not close with anymore. But ultimately, it’s their choice who is or isn’t in their life — and it’s your choice to control the access someone from your past has to your present. If you think there’s a chance your friend might be passing along details of what you’re up to these days to someone who shouldn’t have that information, it’s okay to hit tap “delete.” And if your friend doesn’t like it? Well, they’ve made their choice, and you’re allowed to make yours. Also, if it’s putting you down in the dumps every time you see that this formerly hurtful human is tagged in one of your friend’s posts, then you’re looking out for yourself by hitting the unfollow.

You’re detoxing from social media in general

Sometimes, cutting down on the number of people you see on your feed can be exactly what you need for a little social media detox, and that might mean the time has come to delete people you aren’t as close with anymore. It doesn’t mean that you don’t still care about them, it just means that you’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do to cut down on the time you spend on these apps.

“If you end up skipping someone’s Stories because you are uninterested in what they are posting, unfollow!” clinical psychologist Dr. Lindsay Tulchin told Byrdie. “Only follow people who you truly care about or provide you with real inspiration (e.g., fashion, exercise, food, work, etc.).”

Deciding whether or not you should delete someone is rarely an easy call, but sometimes, it’s truly what’s best for you and your mental health. You should never feel guilty about doing what’s best for you, and real friends will understand and support you with that. If they don’t, just share with them this article and hopefully they’ll get it.

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