Meet Your New Favorite Housewife: Miami’s Elsa Patton

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Last night on Bravo, I caught a sneak preview of The Real Housewives of Miami. And while there were clearly seeds that will sprout into lots of drama between the ladies this season, there was clearly a standout when it comes to ridiculous, entertaining ladies: Marysol Patton‘s mother Elsa.

Marysol describes her mother as a seer, and in the first episode, she goes by her momma's house to get some future insight into her current relationship.

The 76-year-old speaks with a thick accent, and as she quickly explains when Marysol gets shy about talking sex in front of her:

“I'm a woman of this century, Marysol. I'm not a Victorrrrrian Laayyyyy-dy.”

Elsa spent most of her screentime with a big old glass of wine in her hand last night. And the above photo shows mug shots of both Elsa and her daughter, after they got arrested for DUIs last year (on separate nights).

But did Marysol befriend a hooker in jail? Nope! Only her mom swung that one:

In jail, Patton befriended an African American hooker, with whom she emerged when she was eventually released. “Elsa gave the hooker $50 and a ride home,” laughs our source. As for the charges? “She doesn't care. She thinks it makes her more fabulous.”

Also, at one point in the first episode, Marysol explains that she would never get plastic surgery. To which I say: hahahahaa. HA.

Aside from the fact that she's clearly had lip work done, the first time her mother came on screen, I actually thought Marysol's last name was Wildenstein. Because she looks so much like the infamous Cat Lady, Jocelyn Wildenstein, I couldn't get over it. Check out this side by side: