Proof That Christian Grey Is Certifiable: They Had To Use Criminal-Suspect Software To Draw A Picture Of Him

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Christian Grey first photo image likeness software criminalsIt's here—the first image of Christian Grey! Unfortunately, it's not a photo of which actor has been chosen to play him in the movie version of Fifty Shades of Grey; we'll probably find out who's playing Finnick Odair before studios decide on one smolder-eyed hunk to play the BDSM-loving billionaire. Fortunately, however, we do have an image composite of what all of the book's fans think their dream lover looks like.

The new trend seems to be academics wasting their valuable time on Fifty Shades of Grey. Last week, a pop culture expert predicted that the next generation will be a baby boom brought on by this book; over the weekend, University of Lancashire's Dr. Faye Skelton shared this composite of Christian Grey's face. The best part? She used descriptions from twelve women who called into a local radio station… and the kind of software you use to make composites of criminal suspects.

At least Dr. Skelton recognizes how silly this exercise was; she tells BBC News that it was “just a bit of fun” and more of a way to demonstrate the technology more than anything else. “While we don't want to intrude on anyone's fantasies, based on a small sample of women, this is the image of Christian Grey they have in their heads when reading the novels,” she said. “Personally, I think he's quite handsome—although everyone's interpretation will be different.”

Christian Grey first image criminal suspect image composite Fifty Shades of Grey

OK, I'm getting a strong resemblance to Jonathan Taylor Thomas here. Anyone else? Really, I'm just relieved that the image composite doesn't resemble Robert Pattinson. Seeing as Fifty Shades started out as the Twilight fanfic Master of the Universe — and E.L. James changed very little before publishing it — Christian shares Edward Cullen's messy copper hair and maybe also his eyes? I've read the book, but I confess I wasn't paying attention to whether the eye color matches Stephenie Meyer‘s vampires. The JTT resemblance aside, Christian actually looks fairly boring. I was hoping for stronger features, which is why I'm still pushing for Ian Somerhalder (and those eyelashes) to get cast.

Does this image of Christian match your mental image when you read the absurdly bad line “I want to bite that lip”? Or did you envision someone entirely different?

Photos: Vintage Books, UCLAN