The Best And Worst Of Dexter: Serial Killers Are The Sexiest

By  | 

So we're five episodes into the seventh season of Dexter, and things are already getting pretty crazy. We've had plots end, plots begin, and secrets come out, as well as a body count I would describe as “very respectable.” Let's see how the show did this week.

Masuka would make Quinn pound his fist against his will. +1

Deb‘s elevator freakout is a great example of Deb emotions, but don't they have cameras in there she would know to avoid? Then again, she's not that devious, is she? +1

Deb has good reason to be mad at Dexter for taking Victor away from them…he doesn't usually tamper with open cases this much. -1

“Are you lying?” “I don't think so.” Spoken like a true sociopath. +2

Jesus, Hannah McKay, could you be any more obvious about flirting with Dexter? -1

And why does every new female character on this show have to be a tall, thin, sexy blonde? -1, because murderers come in all shapes and sizes.

+1 for Deb's speech to Dex about going to Myrtle Beach together. Family blood is thicker than murder blood.

“Look at us, talking about blood and gore like we're on a date sharing our first sexual experience.” Could Hannah McKay at least pretend like she's not a murderer? Or is she just that confident this guy she just met's boner for her will keep him from turning her in? Dexter's boner aside, they're at a crime scene. What if Battista overhears? -1

Aw, Dexter saved the wedding murderer's family from years of abuse. +1 for being consistent with the show's unwavering message that vigilante justice is totes justified.

+2 for the amazingly tense moment between Deb and LaGuerta in which the jig was almost up.

Oh right, Hannah McKay has immunity so she couldn't be prosecuted for those murders even if Battista did overhear. +1 because the American justice system is indeed broken.

Getting the Colombians to kill Isaac Sirko (f.k.a. Scary English Guy) was the right idea; unfortunately, Dexter forgot that any enemy who figures out who he really is is not going to be vanquished off camera by a couple of random extras. -1

“It's like somebody turned on the hose and left blood everywhere.” Not your best, Masuka. -1

“So we're looking for the fuckin' Terminator?” Aw, she doesn't even realize said Terminator is after her. No points, but bless her heart.


Russian crime bosses aside, who wants to go on a date to their place of work? -1

“The hardest lesson I've learned as lieutenant is knowing when to back the fuck down.” It looks bad to re-open a murder case, etc. Deb might be lying here, but she sounds so much like LaGuerta that it's impossible for Battista to question her. +3

Isn't it incredibly ill-advised for Dexter to risk being seen visiting Isaac in jail? -1

Nice speech about your grampa getting revenge on a fat person in the former Soviet Union. That still doesn't explain your English accent. (No points, will wait and see. WANT TO KNOW.)

“I don't know who you are.” “If you ever find out, you'll regret it.” Tough talk is fun and all, but do you really want to give Scary English Guy any more information about yourself, even in a vague, hinting way? -1

“Lundy didn't figure me out. No reason to think LaGuerta will.” SAYS THE GUY WHO JUST CAME THISCLOSE TO GETTING CAUGHT. -1 because hubris has been the downfall of many.

“I was always chasing you, I could never catch you…you were always just out of reach.” “Maybe we're learning it's better that way.” Ocean metaphors are way cheesy, but I just can't get mad at this. +2

Why is he covering for sexy murder girl?! Dexter so does not need this in his life right now. -1


There were a lot of little deductions here and there that made the score go this low, but I still enjoyed this episode.