This Week On Toddlers & Tiaras & Therapy: 3-Year-Old Says ‘I’m Sexy And I Know It’

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I always assume psychology students watch Toddlers & Tiaras with visions of dancing dollars signs in their head. The show's a rare sociological opportunity to see future teen moms before they're even out of their own diapers. This week's episode's no exception when it comes destroying the self-esteem and general well-being of toddlers and for that, I can only say “Bravo TLC! Job well done!”

Meet Emma. She's three. She like drinking juice boxes, going to the playground and learning her ABCs.

Just kidding.

Emma's a dancer. In 15 or so years, she's what some might call an exotic dancer. But for now, considering that she's 3-years-old, let's just call her a dancer. What makes Emma's dancing so unique on the toddler circuit is that she's sexy and she knows it. Her words, not mine. (You can see the video right here.) Yes, right before this child launches into a sexy shimmy and split, she spits out “I'm sexy and I know it!”

Before you start saying I'm sexualizing her shimmy n' split, please remember that she did that all on her own by saying “I'm sexy and I know it” before doing it. Her parents of course look on lovingly. Because if your child's going to start basing her entire self-worth on her ability to draw attention to her body, might as well start now. God forbid she shows up to kindergarten body language illiterate.

Ugh, will someone grab the go-go juice? This story's making my stomach turn and my pretty feet go ugly.