Bradley Cooper Knew Taylor Swift Was Trouble Before She Walked In

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70th Annual Golden Globe AwardsTaylor Swift does not waste any time, ya'll. It's only been a few weeks since her devastating break-up with Harry Styles, and already she's sniffing around Bradley Cooper, trying to harvest a new celebrity for her vast ex-boyfriend collection.

Taylor is apparently friends with Jennifer Lawrence — who is tight with Bradley after costarring with him in Silver Linings Playbook and being accused of dating him approximately forty times at the Golden Globes — and Swiftykins reportedly tried to use that connection to her advantage. Taylor asked her friend to introduce her to Monsieur Cooper, but when Jennifer felt him out about it, Bradley said he wasn't interested, mainly because she's too young for him. Possibly also because she's a maniac.

“Bradley has absolutely no intention of getting together with Taylor. First of all, her reputation precedes her. Bradley is very wary of dating someone who is a bit of a serial dater like Taylor. He thinks she’s far too young for him and wants to date someone his own age, not 16-years younger because he’s ready for something serious.”

Well yeah, I mean even when people were asking him about Jennifer at the Golden Globes, he said he was way too old for her. I think he even exaggerated and said that at 38, he was old enough to be her father. And Jennifer, 22, is only a year younger than Taylor, 23, so I think we could've all seen this coming. If he thinks a two-time Oscar nominee is too young for him, then I can't imagine what he thinks about a pop star who moonlights as a professional girlfriend for known womanizers.

“It was a little awkward for Bradley . Jennifer came to him and told him that Taylor was interested in getting together. He had to politely decline, knowing full well that Jennifer and Taylor are friends. It was an ambitious move from Taylor, but she’s going to have fixate on someone else as Bradley’s just not that into her.”

Ooooh, movie title burrrrn! Didn't see that one coming! No but seriously, Taylor. Take Amy Poehler and Tina Fey‘s (wonderful, incredible) advice and give yourself some ‘me' time. No boyfriends, no new properties purchased near said boyfriends, and no transparent lyrics about the various failings of said boyfriends. Think you can manage that? For at least another…fifteen minutes before we have to have this conversation again? Cool.