Bruce Willis Holds A ‘Boy Dance Party’ And 4 Other Sketches From SNL Last Night

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Bruce Willis SNL 10-12-13

Okay, so I know we predicted a little awkwardness for this week's SNL based on the Bruce Willis/Cecily Strong promos.  But I actually laughed at those!  I thought maybe it was supposed to be painful, you know, for laughs?  But no, last night proved that Bruce Willis is stiff and awkward with live comedy.  I actually felt bad for him a few times, and I'm pretty sure no SNL host wants to be pitied.  No wonder he hasn't hosted since 1989.

In fairness, the opening monologues have been completely underwhelming (read: they suck) this year, which isn't Bruce's fault. I mean, even Tina Fey couldn't get a decent monologue routine and Miley's was disappointingly tame – though the rest of the show was pretty good last week.  Not sure what's going on with the writers there, because uh, that kind of sets the tone for the whole show. In most of the sketches from last night, Bruce either played second fiddle to the action or played the same straight, bland character the whole way through.  Not sure if the onus for that is on Bruce, the writers, or Janet Jackson‘s left boob.  (I still like to blame Janet Jackson's breasticles for screwing up network television forever.)

Anyway, here are the five best sketches from last night:

1. Boy Dance Party
This proves what I have always wanted to be true. As my fiance always says anytime Madonna or Whitney Houston come on the radio, “There's a tiny gay man inside of me just waiting to get out.”

2. 24-Hour Energy Drink For Dating Actresses
This was absolute perfection in its accuracy and delivery.  I am a grown-up theater kid, and all of my fellow grown-up theater kids and I will get drunk and we will belt out show tunes at the bar sometimes. Also…Kate McKinnon – marry me?

 3. Cold Open: NASA shutdown
Gravity opened last week, so this was good timing.  Bonus points for Taran Killam (who is really shining even more this year) for the erotic asphyxiation line and Keenan, just for wearing the “Carl” name patch.

4. Weekend Update: Jenner Divorce
Look, I know how much time I've spent talking about this divorce so I can appreciate that even SNL can't escape the newsy-ness of it.  I only picked one Weekend Update segment for this post, but an honorable mention goes to Brooks Wheelan's self-deprecating tattoo segment.  Hilar.

5. Protective Son
Once again, the night belonged to someone other than Bruce Willis!  Truly, the best parts of SNL last night had nothing to do with him.  Which is sad.  But I am absolutely loving Taran Killam's energy and prominence this season.  He's the bees' knees. I will now find a way to make “chun” happen.

(Lead Photo: NBC)