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Miley Cyrus’ Song About Her Dead Blowfish Sounds Like A Spoof, But She’s Totally Serious About It

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Miley Cyrus wrecking ball crying

Miley Cyrus had a pet blowfish. His name was Pablow. He died. She wrote a song about him. She sang that song while wearing a unicorn onesie. There were tears. She posted it on Facebook. That's the short version of this tale. The long version involves watching the performance and/or reading the ridiculous song lyrics. It sounds like a spoof song, but Miley treats it like “Candle in the Wind.”

Pablow apparently passed away a few months ago. Miley was so torn up about it she got a tattoo of him. Bet you thought you'd never hear about Pablow ever again after that. Well, you were wrong. Miley still had a bunch of extremely literal, unintentionally (or intentionally?) hilarious lyrics up her unicorn sleeve. People has a helpful transcript of the whole song, which reads like a first grader wrote it. Here's the highlight, at least in my opinion:

On Saturday night we all went out to eat
But I can never decide so someone chose sushi
I got soup and I ordered rice
But watching my friends eat my friend ruined my appetite

Watching my friends eat my friend. Watching my friends eat my friend. I can't be sure if she's using all fish to represent Pablow or if she actually donated him to a sushi restaurant to serve to her table. I never know what's going on when Miley's being Miley.

Then she adds this heartfelt line:

Oh Pablow the Blowfish if they only knew you like I do they'd love you too

I don't want to be insensitive (JK I always do), but can you ever really know a blowfish? They just float around in tank, right? Or am I missing something?

By the time you get to the end of the video and Miley's voice starts breaking through sobs, you'll be convinced this is all a weird dream. But it's not. It's very, very real and very, very weird.

(GIF: Tumblr)

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