Mark Wahlberg Is Ready To Be Pardoned For That Hate Crime When He Blinded A Man

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Mark Wahlberg Is Ready To Be Pardoned For That Hate Crime When He Blinded A Man Mark Wahlberg I wanted to punch you in the face GIF gifI don’t know how familiar you are with Mark Wahlberg‘s backstory, but are we aware that he blinded a man? And that the attack was allegedly racially-themed? But don’t bother spending time trying to wrap your brain around that fact, because Mark wants an official pardon for it. I BET YOU DO BUD.

I honestly don’t know how I missed this — possibly by being six months old at the time or whatever — but in April 1988, Mark attacked a Vietnamese immigrant named Thanh Lam so severely with a wooden stick that he fell down unconscious. Later that same night, he found another Asian man, this one named Hoa Trinh, and smashed him so hard in the face that he ultimately lost vision in his right eye. According to accounts, Mark called Thanh Lam ‘Vietnam fucking shit’ during the beating, and used the slurs ‘gook’ and ‘slant eye’ during police proceedings leading up to his conviction and subsequent forty-five day jail sentence.

But despite all evidence to the contrary such as his use of slurs and the fact that both victims were Asian, Mark has insisted ever since that race didn’t play a role in the attacks. Instead, he blames it on intoxication. Okay buddy. And as if that wasn’t ridiculous enough, now he wants to be formally pardoned for his offense by the commonwealth of Massachusetts. Charming.

You can read his pardon application yourself if you’d like, but the gist of it is that Mark is tired of having the attack on his record, and he’d like for it to be gone please and thank you, to show the youth of American that criminals truly can be rehabilitated.

“My hope is that, if I receive a pardon, troubled youths will see this as an inspiration and motivation that they too can turn their lives around.”

Which…is some grade-A bullshit, because all it would really show them is that if you make enough money and get famous enough, you can erase all traces of hate crimes from your official record! Because there’s no deterrent like the knowledge that you only have to take responsibility for your actions for as long as you want to! What a fun lesson!

Keep up the great work ~inspiring today’s youth~ Marky Mark!

(Image: giphy)