This Quote About Shooting Guys’ Dicks Off Is The First Appealing Thing January Jones Has Said

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It's a well known fact that a lot of people don't like January Jones. Maybe it's the character she plays on Mad Men or maybe the stiff way she comes off in interviews, but she is never going to be America's sweetheart. Imagine, then, my pleasant surprise when I read an interview with her that actually made me smile.

In an interview promoting her new movie Sweetwater (in which she plays a former prostitute in 19th century Mexico), January Jones said some things that were actually kind of rad. For instance:

The last few films I've done, I've played the villain. I just think it's really fun for me because it's not things that I get to do in real life. I'm not going out and punching people and blowing shit up. I mean, if you're an actor, wouldn't you want to do fun stuff like that? Like shooting and riding horses and shooting a guy's dick off and things?

I would indeed! Shooting a guy's dick off sounds like lots of fun. It would even be worth having a bunch of people who can't tell the difference between real stuff and make believe think I do things like that IRL. “Watch out for that chick! She's crazy, she'll shoot your dick off!” Think of all the free Starbucks I would get.

She also has some real talk to dish on Betty Francis (who will always be Betty Draper to me):

Right, you want Betty to [take revenge]. And she does a little bit, but there are times when I get so frustrated with her. You know? Like, why don't you say something?

I felt like the first few seasons were rough, and then she's made steps in the last couple seasons to be happier, by leaving Don and marrying Henry and trying to be a better mom. And I think that she's in the best place we've seen her — but I'm not sure she'll ever be completely happy. I don't know if she knows how to do that. She's one of those people who's always searching for something else, so even if she finds it, I don’t know if she'd recognize it. And it's sad, because Henry's, like, a great husband and a great guy, and he took in her kids, and he's like this kind of perfect guy, and she's still searching for something.

I guess she could go to a place where she's more self-actualized?
I don’t know what would make her happy. I mean, even when she found out last year that she wasn't dying, she was like, “Great, so I'm just fat.” I mean, there's no silver lining for her, but I don't know.

But maybe Matt Weiner will give her a silver lining?
But I don't think he wants — that's not realistic, and he's very true to human nature. Some people don't get silver linings, and that's not interesting anyway.


January Jones understands something essential about life: some people are just going to suck no matter what happens to them, and not every story has a happy ending. It's pretty rare to see that in mainstream culture, but shows like The Sopranos, Breaking Bad, and Mad Men have done a disturbingly good job of showing it. All this from a self-described South Dakota person who likes to drink beer, watch sports and eat “a lot of meat and potatoes.” Not everyone has to live an artsy lifestyle to understand the pain of existence.

She wouldn't reveal any spoilers about the new season of Mad Men (WHAT A BITCH!), but she did say “I'm in it more” and “I've gotten to do a lot of weird stuff,” so make of that what you will.