Entertainment

In Which Lindsay Lohan Brags About Handling Whitney Houston’s Dead Body

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Lindsay Lohan shrugging GIFAll day, I was waiting for a sign that I was truly on the internet. I mean I knew I was working, but everything was so calm and collected and normal that I couldn't be sure I was really on there. And then all of a sudden, there it was, the article that proved everything. You know the one I'm talking about — the one where Lindsay Lohan brags about handling Whitney Houston‘s body bag.

I know what you're thinking and no, that isn't just a bunch of nouns and verbs and one irrelevant famous person and one dead one that we mashed up into a celebrity Mad Lib.  We wouldn't even have thought to make this up. This is real news from real life, and it comes straight out of the mouth of LiLo herself, so get your preferred spice ready (not everyone likes grains of salt) and hold onto your hat.

Once upon a time, long ago, when Lindsay Lohan was convicted of shoplifting, and part of her punishment was 120 hours of community service. She completed this community service at the LA County Morgue during the five months between October 2011 and March 2012, and although her duties were supposed to be things like mopping, emptying trash, and washing sheets, she claims that she also found some time in there TO HANDLE WHITNEY HOUSTON'S GODDAMN BODY BAG. Because that's a normal thing for us to be finding out about two-and-a-half years after the fact.

But there it is, slipped into a conversation she had with The Telegraph to promote her West End debut in the incredibly ill-advised ‘Speed The Plow':

“[It was] effed up and inappropriate – because a lot of other people were meant to do it, and they were like: ‘No, they can’t handle it. Lohan can.’ It’s different for me than it would be for other people – like, no one would really have to work at the morgue in LA and roll a body bag for Whitney Houston.”

HELLO WHAT. Normally you might write that off as just another unsubstantiated Lindsay claim, like the time she wanted J.K. Rowling to write her memoirs (I KNOW), but since Whitney died on February 11th, 2012, when Lindsay was still working off her hours at the morgue, there's actually a possibility that this is true. WHAT IS HAPPENING ANYMORE.

(Image: Teen)

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