Entertainment

Lindsay Lohan’s Super Bowl Commercial Is So Painful It Should Have Been Banned

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Lindsay Lohan Esurance Super Bowl commercial 2015

Did you watch the Super Bowl last night? Did you stick around for the commercials? How about the one for Esurance, starring Lindsay Lohan? If you don't remember that one, there's a very good chance you blocked it out of your memory because it was so bad. And I mean really bad. You know how GoDaddy pulled that commercial making fun of Budweiser's puppy ads? This one should have been pulled instead. It'll make you cringe so hard you'll pull a face muscle, and then it'll just make you so depressed you'll need to spend the rest of the day curled up on the couch eating cheese puffs.

The commercial's only 40 seconds long, but it makes an impact. A painful impact. The gist is that Lindsay Lohan drives recklessly up to the curb at a school and declares that she's “sorta” some kid's mom because they have a few things in common. It makes some point about yadda yadda yadda insurance something. I was way too distracted by Lindsay's acting to absorb the moral of the story. It's no secret that Lindsay isn't exactly a great actress. Even back in her heyday I thought she was mediocre at best. Yeah, that includes Mean Girls. Every time I rewatch it, I'm like “Do you really want to say your line that way? You're sure about that?”

But this commercial really cements her suckiness. It's so, so awful, and her voice has gotten even more gravelly and mature than it already was. Not to mention her face has just settled on that one expression and doesn't really want to try any others out. Then once I got past the terrible delivery and focused on the message of the commercial I got really depressed. You might say she's just making fun of herself, but it's not like Kim Kardashian joking about her selfies. Reckless driving is something Lindsay is still facing the legal consequences of. Ugh okay, I'll stop complaining and let you not enjoy the commercial for yourself.

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