Lindsay Lohan Will Guest Host Chelsea Lately To Ratings That Will Make Kris Jenner Cry

By  | 

Lindsay Lohan Scary Movie 5 premiere April 2013

In promising news, TMZ is reporting that Lindsay Lohan wants to stay in rehab an extra 3-4 days, even though she's free to leave on Wednesday, in order to make a smoother transition into post-rehab life. In “oh my god whaaaattttt?” news, once Lindsay's out, she'll fill in for Chelsea Handler as guest host on Chelsea Lately. This is happening, you guys.

Lindsay will host the show next Monday, August 5th, before her big interview with Oprah, which will air August 18th. Either Oprah gave her blessing or she'll punish Lindsay during her interview by withholding the every-one-has-an-edge brownies her minions made. That's right. The wrath of Oprah is no joking matter. You know what is a joking matter, however? Everything Chelsea Handler talks about on her show. That ranges from Amanda Bynes' hospitalization to of course Lindsay Lohan. Oh the irony that Chelsea is having Lindsay on her show to replace her and not to sit in that chair and be harassed by her. I have so many questions about how this hosting gig will work.

First off, will Lindsay joke about herself? Will she know she's joking about herself? Will she even show up? Will she skip around to five different late night shows before finally arriving at Chelsea's studio? How many times will she change her outfit during the half-hour show? Who will she interview? Will she interview herself? Is this a sign of a comeback or just a desperate attempt to cash in on her rehab stint? It's all too much!

You know what question I am able to answer quite confidently? What kind of ratings this episode will get. Answer: high ratings. The kind of ratings that will cause Kris Jenner to sit in the corner of her black and white foyer replica sobbing in the fetal position. It might even prompt the premature reveal of North West, to which everyone will reply, “Yeah, that's nice. Hold on, I have to check my channel guide for the seventeenth time today to make sure Lindsay is really hosting Chelsea's show. Should I set an alarm? How many DVRs should I set in case I miss it? Should I buy an extra TV?”

After this, will E! retitle the show Lindsay Lately? It does have a better ring to it. You can't go wrong with alliteration.

(Photo: Daniel Tanner/WENN.com)