Meet The Fan Who’s So Upset About Kristen Stewart Cheating That She Wants To Murder Me

By  | 

Won't anyone think of the children in this whole mess of a “Kristen Stewart cheating on Robert Pattinsonpublicity stunt? Because according to the wonderfully violent comment I received on this blog post this morning, I'm starting to think that they're not taking this news so well.

So I hope the profits for Cosmopolis, the Snow White and the Huntsman sequel and most importantly,  Breaking Dawn: Part 2 are worth what they're doing to the fans.

And what this one upset fan plans to do to me. And I suppose Kristen Stewart if she ever comes out of hiding.

While my degree in therapy only comes from a 3-day course obtained through Yahoo Answers, I can clearly see that my frenemy/murderer feels angry about this entire scandal — and that “By The Truth About YOU!” is only taking it out on me because there's an option to do that.

Unfortunately for all the betrayed Robsten fans out there, you can't ensure that a comment you make about Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson or even Rupert Sanders will reach them.

So they're forced by this media circus to leave vivid and violent messages for blog editors that sound like they're ripped from the pages of a Law & Order writer's middle school diary.

While I spend the rest of my stupid,  fugly, whore life running from people holding blunt objects, the fat cats in Hollywood will just be sitting on top of piles of money, counting everything they made from this manipulative scheme.

Rupert Sanders, Liberty Ross, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson will be drinking mint juleps with Reese Witherspoon and Jodie Foster, cackling about how they fooled an entire country into believing that Hollywood's highest paid actress would be stupid enough to get photographed cheating in front of a tourist destination.

As if.