Entertainment

Kourtney Kardashian Says Baby North West Is Ruining Everything, Ugh

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Kourtney Kardashian hosting Labor Day party in Vegas August 2013I don't know if you know this, but the Kardashian Family is like a little ecosystem. Just like a plant transforms sunlight into energy, Kris Jenner and her clan transform publicity and attention into warmth and love and, most importantly, money. Or they did, anyway, before stupid old North West came along and ruined everything.

Usually Kardashians don't have to go any further than E! for the attention necessary to keep their family going, but sometimes, when it's an especially cloudy day out, or no one can muster up the energy to strap on their mic packs or get into makeup, they're forced to turn to each other. I KNOW. I know. I said it was a dark time.

And up until recently, Kim Kardashian was a really reliable font of attention. Pretty much everyone else in her family was paired off, but Kanye West was always overseas, sniffing around in Paris, and even though Kim was pregnant, she made it pretty clear that everything about that state was the worst. So she'd presumably just hang around the house all day, hiding from the cameras, flooding the Kardashian system with affection.

Everyone loved the attention from silly old neglected Kim, but nobody more so than Kourtney Kardashian and her son Mason Disick, who blossomed under the attention. But then came baby North West, and all the love and affection got directed to her, making Kourtney and Mason shrivel up like little weeds. And Kourtney…I mean Mason…is really upset about it:

“He gets a little jealous because he and Kim were so close. He doesn’t understand because he’s not the big center of attention. I don’t think [Kim] knows what to do; she’s just like, ‘You don’t like me anymore?’ She feels like he … is getting older and changing, and I think she gets confused and doesn’t know how to handle it.  He’s like, ’Why don’t you like me anymore?’ ’cause he sees her with the baby.”

Oh okay, Kourtney. These are all thoughts your…three-and-a-half year old has been having? We're sure? We're definitely solid on the fact that you're not confusing your own feelings with his? Great. As long as we're clear.

“I give him so much attention, and he gets so much attention from everyone else that I’m like I don’t even know.”

Well said, Kourtney. I'm swearing a mental vendetta against Kim and North for ruining Mason's life even as we speak.

(Image: Try CW / WENN.com)