Kim Kardashian Isn’t Naming Her Son South, but Don’t Worry, She Picked Something Stupider

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Kim Kardashian Ellen Show September 2015

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's baby son is scheduled to arrive on Christmas Day, so it's about time for them to start thinking about what to name him. Kim has already ruled out South as an option, saying it would be “the stupidest thing ever.” She reiterated that when she visited The Ellen DeGeneres Show this week, saying she rolls her eyes whenever anyone suggests it. So she and Ellen brainstormed some other choices, and Kim shared her interest in a certain other direction-inspired name that I'd argue is even stupider than South.

Ellen starts reading off some name ideas that would go with the last name West (including my Wild Wild West idea, which Kim thinks is oh so funny), and upon hearing “East Meets West,” Kim reveals that she really likes the name Easton, but Kanye wouldn't go for it. “Easton is good,” Ellen manages to say with a straight face, surreptitiously crossing it off as the next funny name she was about to read off. (I'm guessing.) Just to reiterate, Kim Kardashian hates the name South West, but likes the name Easton West. The audience laughs their asses off over the name, but Kim appears very sincere, which is troubling.

If you ask me, Easton West is even worse than South West, because it creates an even cheesier pun — East ‘N West. Your child should not have a name that could be interpreted as including ‘N. That should just be a universal rule of baby-naming. And I'm not knocking the name Easton in general. I think it's a perfectly acceptable name for someone whose surname isn't a direction. I guess Kim forgot that, in the same interview where she said South was stupid, she also said she and Kanye wouldn't be going with another direction. What gives, lady?