Justin Bieber Buys A Puppy, World Places Bets On What Country He’ll Abandon It In
In news certain to make most people who care even the tiniest bit about the welfare of animals cringe, Justin Bieber has bought a new puppy. His name is Petey and he's a 7-week-old American bulldog Justin discovered in a pet store in Stratford, Canada yesterday. According to TMZ, Justin was only there to “window shop,” but as often happens during window shopping, the urge to actually shop kicked in and he bought Petey for $600, along with a collar, toys, and dog food. I'm surprised he knew enough to buy the dog food, considering he his track record with animals.
What track record, you ask? Oh, just the fact that whenever Bieber gets an animal in his care, he ends up abandoning it somewhere. Take for example his hamster PAC, whom he handed off to some fan at a concert and who died a few months later. Or his monkey Mally, whom he tried to sneak through German customs. The monkey was confiscated by the authorities and Justin never came back to claim him. See, for Justin Bieber pets are like those Tamagotchi toys. Remember when you were a kid and you got tired of virtually feeding it so you're parents had to do it for you so you wouldn't throw a tantrum when it virtually died? In this case, the entire world is Justin Bieber's parents, because clearly his real parents aren't going to do it.
Add to this track record the fact that he bought the puppy instead of considering adopting a rescue dog, and it seems pretty clear what his state of mind was concerning taking this pet home. Forget about it being a living, breathing creature with a life span and everything. I propose we start a Save Petey campaign to rescue this little cutie from Bieber's clutches. We can even have the sad Sarah McLachlan music and everything. Please don't let this pooch get left with some strange screaming fan in some country he's not familiar with. And also don't let him stay with Justin either. That's bad too.