I Guess If Jason Segel Doesn’t Want To Date Me, He Can Date Michelle Williams

By  | 

In semi-surprising couple news, Us Weekly reports that Jason Segel and Michelle Williams are apparently dating. While I still hold out hope that one day I'll have a chance encounter with Jason in an airport security line and say something so incredibly witty and astute that he'll have no choice but to marry me right there, I'm okay with him being “happy” in the meantime.

Apparently the now star-crossed lovers have been friends forever and only recently took their relationship to the next level. Just like a classic Mila Kunis/Justin Timberlake/Natalie Portman/Ashton Kutcher movie plot. One second you're best friends and the next second your friendly walks are being referred to as romantic strolls by a tabloid.

An Us Weekly source says, “they're smitten and very serious.” While I usually distrust all nameless sources, I have to admit it might be true in this case. There's photo evidence of Jason hanging out with Michelle's daughter Matilda — and Michelle doesn't seem like the  kind of mom to let her kids hang out with just anybody. Especially not when scooters are involved.

The only thing really stand between them and true love (besides my evil eye) is the long distance thing. She lives in Brooklyn, he lives in L.A. While I'm sure she could find organic food co-ops in L.A and while I'm sure he could muppets in Brooklyn, it seems like a deal breaker. Mostly because I want it to be a deal breaker.

She already got to date Ryan Gosling in a movie. There's no need for her to be selfish.