George Clooney gets frisky, Eva Mendes gets naked, Donald Trump gets generous, Britney Spears gets religion, and more

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Happy Thursday, Internet friends! How are you today? Right now this second, I'm watching Pirates of the Caribbean 2 in preparation for watching my new copy of Pirates of the Caribbean 3. I forgot how bad PotC 2 really was; it's so horribly thought out. Ergh. It's also FREEZING ASS COLD in my house at this point in time, mostly because I'm too cheap to turn the heat up any higher OR get some warmer clothes on, which, really, I have nothing to complain about at this point, do I? Let's get to the gossip; just ignore my whinings.

First, George Clooney and Brad Pitt get a little frisky in the bathroom:

Heh heh – “I have a wide stance”….loves it. Next: Jack Nicholson shares how Angelica Huston kicked his philandering ass after he got another lady pregnant:

The great love of Jack's life was actress Anjelica Huston, whom he met in 1973. Their romance lasted until 1989, when Anjelica learned that actress Rebecca Broussard was pregnant with Jack's baby. “I was in a quandary,” Jack quietly explains to PARADE's Dotson Rader. “I knew having a child was a boon to my life, but I was in a wonderful relationship with Anjelica. It was as good as it gets. I immediately told her what was up, and she made the decision for us.” The public presumed that Nicholson had dumped Huston for Broussard, a younger woman. The truth is the opposite. “Anjelica's first response was, ‘You have to support this woman,' ” Nicholson says. “Her second response was to come down to my job and beat the hell out of me. She really beat me up, I tell you. Anjelica can punch! Meanwhile, Rebecca didn't want me to separate from Anjelica. Well, they both have good taste,” he says laughing.


I know he's a great actor, but he just seems like a giant tool, doesn't he? Hey! It's NAKED TIME with Eva Mendes!
This is her new ad for PETA; obviously, she feels very strongly about not wearing fur. And being naked. – source

If I ever decide to be a waitress again (I was a disaster, it's not going to happen), I want Donald Trump to come in so I can get him to give ME a $10K tip. Check this out, peeps:
Apparently he asked the waiter what was the biggest tip he'd ever gotten; he said $500 on a $1000 check, so the Donald decided to Trump it. You've got a lot of money, WE GET IT. – source

Well, looky here kids! It's the daily Seriously, What The F*$&, Britney Spears? moment!!!!
In her daily quest to…..do…..something, Britney Spears is now seemingly turning to religion as a panacea for all her self-inflicted issues. She's tried a lot of stuff, yalls: Kabbalahism, Federlineism, Sexism, Alcoholism….let's see if Baby Jebus can turn the tide for our Brit and help her to stop basically flushing herself down the toilet. – source

Speaking of toilet, Joan Rivers recently performed for the Queen of England (why, God only knows) and said some BAD WORDS. Like, a LOT of bad words. And apparently that's just not good form!

Apparently comedienne Joan was desperate not to swear, but could not help overstepping the mark.
And at one point she said: “My body is so f***ing…” before clamping her hand over her mouth to prevent any more profanities from slipping out.

You know, I don't mind a little bit of cussing, but you would think she would have the good sense to shut it in front of the Queen. And what the HELL has Joan done to herself? Seriously, is she TRYING to look like the CatWoman?
Scary thing when plastic surgery goes horribly wrong – but it's even scarier when you disregard all common sense and just decide to run with it…and run with it….and run with it.

Let's move on…today the Grammy nominations were announced, and as expected, crackhead Amy Winehouse pretty much stole the show:
amy-winehouse-red1.pngAmy Winehouse, the British soul singer whose battles with addiction have turned her into a tabloid regular, drew six Grammy nominations, including nods for the four marquee categories, today as the contenders for the 50th annual awards ceremony were announced. – source
Even though she's probably lurching drunk through an alley AS WE SPEAK, she still is incredibly talented. Let's have a wee listen:

Aw, that's the stuff right there. Hmmm…what else…oh! Tori Spelling will soon be shilling for Nutrisystem.
tori-spelling-nutrisystem.pngApparently she used it to drop all her baby weight. You know, I did NS once upon a time, and it really does work – if you can take the sh*tty food, high price, and DO NOT CHEAT EVER EVER EVER. Plus, once you go back to “real” food, you will gain all the weight back. It's quite the little racket. – source

Anyone recognize this guy?

It's Weston Cage, son of Nicholas Cage, trying to be all emo and stuff. I just have one thing to say to this guy:

Let's see what else we got:

  • Please say no: there's a Fergie sex tape?
  • Britney Spears is looking for a body double
  • Vanessa Hudgens is tired of Zac being such a sissy
  • A Beyonce crotch shot – maybe

That's pretty much it, Internet friends – until Friday!!! See you on the flip side!