Predictably, This Friends Reunion Update Contains Exactly Zero Good News

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Friends fake reunion poster 2013After hearing that incredibly verifiable rumor yesterday that there might be a reunion season of Friends in 2014, I have some incredibly predictable and yet still perfectly heartbreaking news for everyone: no there won't. I mean yeah. I guess I really knew that the moment I saw the announcement in the first place — it was the rumor we needed, but not the one we deserved right now. Even though some ten-year old so carefully photoshopped that poster of the iconic couch and that oh-so-familiar font, I think we all realized this wasn't going to happen the second that it was released by Star Media, whom I'd never heard of before or since. We saw the post and our little hearts started going pitter patter and we were like, “Guys! GUYS! This could be real, okay? Everybody! We can make this real if we believe hard enough! Clap your hands if you believe in fairies, okay?!?” It didn't matter that every single cast member is deeply embroiled in a variety of other projects right now, from Jennifer Aniston planning her wedding, to Courteney Cox blazing uncharted territory in the field of plastic surgery. Everybody's got stuff going on, and even the press release said that none of the stars had signed on, and yet…we kept clapping, trying to bring that little Tinkerbell back to life.

But we didn't believe strongly enough, because Warner Brothers spoke out yesterday to officially confirm our worst suspicions — that absolutely no reunion season is in the works. Then, as if we weren't handling enough difficult, nostalgia-based emotion for one day, Friends co-creator Marta Kaufman cut us right down to the white meat when she announced to E! Online that not only is there no reunion planned now, but that it will ‘never ever happen'.

Okay, cool, so I'll put you down for a strong maybe?

(Image: Zap2It)