Entertainment

Enrique Iglesias Made A Great Porn, But Seems To Think It’s A Music Video (NSFW)

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Enrique Iglesias in I'm A Freak video February 2014We made it one month, America. One month into 2014 without a super porn-y music video ala last year's ‘Blurred Lines'. It was nice while it lasted, but all walls must eventually fall down I suppose, and this one was already weak from last week's foray into booty-popping against wallpaper in Shakira and Rihanna‘s video for ‘Can't Remember To Forget You', and it couldn't help but come a-tumbling down with Enrique Iglesias‘ ever-so-charming ‘I'm A Freak'.

He's only been single for four months, having recently broken up with Anna Kournikova after twelve years together, but it's clear that Enrique hasn't wasted any time. He's been patting rumps and eating dessert treats off of models and smelling panties willy-nilly, and now here's a song about it! Naturally he recruited Pitbull for the task as well, dug him out of whatever Miami mole-rat warren he'd been spending his nights in, because it's right up his alley. And together the two of them wax poetic about all the beautiful buttz in the world.

Honestly if this was a scientific paper and it had to have an abstract that boiled down the thesis into one sentence summing it up, it'd be: BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTSBUTTSBUTTSBUTTSBUTTS.

Did you catch all that? I hope so, but even if you didn't, don't worry! There will be plenty of opportunities to catch up, as approximately 70% of the shots in this video are half-naked rumps bobbing excitedly as Enrique lounges contentedly over them. His black button eyes gleaming, half-drunk on lady smells, he lurches through the party, performing an almost biblical laying on of hands.

Robin Thicke? I'm pretty sure this is shots fired on your wheelhouse. Do you have a retort?

(Image: Tumblr)