For Engaged People, Emma Roberts And Evan Peters Have No Chemistry In The Adult World Trailer

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Evan Peters and Emma Roberts kissing in Adult World trailer January 2014It's a good thing that Emma Roberts and Evan Roberts are already engaged, because if they'd seen the lack of chemistry between the two of them in this new trailer for the movie Adult World, I don't know if they would've ever started dating in the first place.

They must have something really special together — especially to ignore the clear warnings latent in that well-documented incidence of domestic-violence last year — but you sure can't tell from the wooden, stilted dialogue between them. I mean where is the youthful passion we were promised? Where are the star-crossed lovers so desperately drawn to one another that sometimes their affections have to be expressed in violence? That's how the media explained it away, anyway, like hours after Emma's arrest. So romantic!

But anyway, whether or not you think the best way to show that you love someone is by hitting them, you won't find enough love (of any variety) in this trailer to make it worth watching. It's just shot after shot of cliches, fake introspection, and Emma wondering aloud if she should kill herself because no one appreciates her poetry. Answer: probably not. But you should also stop wearing that stupid hat, because you are theoretically a Human Being Who Would Like To Be Taken Seriously In The World, and that headpiece says otherwise. It says, “Someone please hail an L train for me post haste, because I was supposed to be lounging outside a tattoo parlor in Williamsburg yesterday.”

The hat made me so apathetic that I stopped watching halfway through, but if I had to guess, I'd say that working in a porn shop somehow causes an emotional coming-of-age for Emma's character, making John Cusack‘s character and Evan Peters' character take her seriously on exactly the same day, which is coincidentally the very same moment that the entire literary world decides to sit up and take notice.

I CAN SEE THE FUTURE. Just not this movie. Or why these two are getting married in real life.