Crushable Quotable: Jenelle Evans Is Single and Ready to Mingle

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Are you a homeless drifter in need of a girl to mooch off of? Good news – Teen Mom 2‘s Jenelle Evans is back on the market. In a text message (yeah, I know, I had to read it like four times just to be sure) to E!, Jenelle said that she was a) not smoking weed anymore and b) had dumped hanger-on boyfriend Kieffer Delp. Here's some more of her awesome texty communications:

imagine this… having a mother like mine, trying to move out but cant, having yr probation officer LIVE ON YR STREET, had to quit smoking, cant hangout with all the people yu hungout with, being alone all the time, not having anyone to talk to while yr upset, people staring at yu every public place and taking pics behind yr back so they can sell yu out like yr a caged animal in a freak show.

Jenelle, you are totally welcome to quit Teen Mom 2 and give your paycheck to your mom Barbara Evans instead, since she's the one actually raising your kid. I'll be waiting for your confirmation text.