Conan Spends The Day Hanging Out With The American Girl Dolls, Rumors Start That He’s Felicity’s Father
In a move to make you extremely jealous, Conan O'Brien dropped by the American Girl doll store in Los Angeles. And by dropped by, I actually mean spent the entire day hanging out there. I would be lying to you if I didn't say that I started vicariously living through him the second I pressed play. As someone unlucky to be born in the decade before the American Girl doll stores started popping up, I'm beyond jealous of all the children who get to spend the day in there without being written off as creeps. I mean, legally I should be allowed in. I, too, am an American girl with a story. And I too come with cool accessories and a simple back story. But alas, I'm not welcome into the stores.
While I don't think middle-aged men are commonly allowed into the stores either, they made an exception for Conan. Either because he's famous or because they wanted to see if he's a genetic match for Felicity. Poor, poor old-fashioned Felicity. Sure she had a horse, but what good is a four-legged friend when you have to poop in an outhouse (sold separately, of course).
Anyways, Conan came in to the store for the day and got the full tour — including, but not limited to — a lunch with the American Girl doll of his choice. Can you believe it? I would sell my grandmother to have lunch with any American Girl doll, let alone one of my choice! While I very much want you to watch this, I also want you to know that you'll go through a lot emotionally when you do. Also I want you to know that things get weird — but that's what happens when a middle-aged dude hangs out with dolls.