I Hope Amanda Bynes’ New Year’s Resolution Is To Stop Driving And Also Being Really Weird

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tao anniversary 041009

Since Amanda Bynes is a rich, famous female celebrity, she was dismissed of all charges today stemming from her two hit-and-run incidents earlier this year.  Bynes was reportedly able to reach a civil compromise in both cases, as the two separate victims agreed to dismiss the charges in favor of financial settlements, according to a “source.”

What I take this to mean is whatever money Amanda has leftover from What a Girl Wants was used to pay off the victims of her erratic and dangerous driving.  As someone who has been involved in a hit-and-run before, I can't express how much this pisses me off.

Amanda Bynes had pled not guilty to both charges, which were brought against her in September. The first charge stemmed from an incident in April, after the actress allegedly rear-ended another vehicle while driving an Enterprise rental car. The second charge was the result of an incident in August, as Bynes allegedly left the scene of a minor accident without exchanging information with the other driver.

Since she's someone who locks herself in fitting rooms and public restrooms, the whole hit-and-run thing is probably just a misunderstanding because she's really presented herself as having her shit together throughout most of 2012.  Is it her fault that people get in her way?

Her legal team has dubbed this a “major legal victory.”  Really?  That's so weird, because my definition of that same thing would be when a legitimately innocent person comes off of death row.  But that's really dramatic of me.  A batshit crazy white girl (allegedly) who is only famous for B-List tween movies who has too much time, money, and probably cocaine on her hands is much more of a victim here.


(photo: WENN)