It's pretty certain that Paris Hilton can't act her way out of a paper bag. (Side note: where the heck did that saying come from?!) So it's a good thing she's finally landed a role we're pretty sure even she can nail: Paris Hilton. Paris will be playing herself on the hour-long April 3rd eppie of My Name Is Earl, during which Earl is knocked unconscious and has a long dream sequence. "When we wrote the role of Paris Hilton in the script, we weren't exactly sure who to go with for the role," the show's executive producer says. "But after an exhausting search we finally settled on a relatively unknown actress by the name of Paris Hilton." Sigh! Don't you sometimes wish that Paris was truly unknown?