It's 3 a.m. on Tuesday, and Lindsay Lohan is leaving a New York club. She gets into her white BMW, starts to slowly move through the throngs of paparazzi swarming her, and "taps" a photog with her car. (It looks to us like he jumped on the car, but whatevs.)

The paparazzo proceeded to act like he was run down by a car going 100 mph, rolling around on the ground and yelping in "pain." Now we know hitting someone with your car is wrong, but the car was barely moving, and this guy gave a performance that rivaled J.Lo in Gigli.

Lindsay then proceeded to get into her bodyguard's black SUV, and they sped away, leaving the scene. The paparazzi began to chase Lindsay in hot pursuit, but when police saw the car of photogs make the illegal turn, they were ticketed. Meanwhile, the allegedly injured photog was taken to the hospital by ambulance, where he was treated for a bruised knee (probably from flailing around on the street) and released. Lindsay and her bodyguard returned to the scene about an hour later.

Don't believe us? Check the video! (P.S. -- while Access Hollywood claims that Lindsay admits on camera that she hit the guy, it doesn't sound like her voice in the least, in our humble opinion.)